This time I'm staying
by gypsyscarfwoman
Summary: Jane and Kurt rescue Avery. Written because canon is making me cry. Very loosely based on the promo pictures for 3x11.


_Fanfiction, because canon hurts like hell. (Honestly, writing this was more like an exorcism than a creative art.) Very loosely based on the promo pics for 3x11._

* * *

There was no conversation on the plane. Clem was pacing, occasionally muttering under his breath. Jane knew this was how he prepared for missions, walking through scenarios in his head and coming up with ways to counter all the many things that could go wrong. And Kurt…

Kurt was hunched over the tablet displaying the specs for the building where they thought Avery was being held. She knew how he prepared, by gathering every single bit of intel he could and committing it to memory, never knowing which piece of information might prove to be the key needed to complete the op and escape unscathed.

Jane herself was numb. She'd taken her turn with the tablet, memorizing the specs, sitting by Kurt for part of the flight, careful not to speak or brush up against him, before retreating to the other side of the plane. Now she just needed quiet.

She was having a hard time focusing. All she could see was the photo that Patterson had dug up from Avery's high school yearbook, taken before her adoptive mother died, before her father committed suicide. Before she got sent off on a wild goose chase to find her birth mother and ended up possibly dead at the hand of her stepfather.

Jane closed her eyes, trying not to think about Kurt or about that part of the story, and brought the picture to mind again. Avery had a wide smile, and eyes that sparkled. She looked happy. Full of life.

Jane's hands clenched in her lap. Avery was _alive_. She had to keep thinking that way, even though she was afraid to hope. To think that she was, to come this far, and then find out that she hadn't actually survived? Jane didn't know how she would bear it if that were the case.

She had to be ready. She pushed all the thoughts, her daughter's smile, out of her mind and drew a deep breath, then began to run through the plan and the contingencies again in her mind.

###

The op went more or less as planned. They timed their attack to take out the guards patrolling the perimeter simultaneously. Then Kurt went to take out the guards manning the security system and take it offline, while Clem handled the off-duty guards in the bunkhouse. Jane took down the guards in the hall outside the room where Avery was being held, and kicked in the locked door.

The room was empty.

Jane lowered her gun, scanning the room again, then crossed to look in the attached bathroom. Empty.

They had seen a heat signature inside this room less than ten minutes ago. Where had she gone?

Some sixth sense made her pivot just in time to see Avery rise from where she'd taken cover under the bed.

Avery froze when their eyes met.

"Are you okay?" Jane stepped closer, scanning her daughter for any sign of injury.

Avery nodded. "How are you here?" she demanded, finding her voice.

Jane couldn't suppress a smile, hearing her own voice—and attitude—in her daughter's voice. And she suddenly understood why Kurt had been so certain that Avery was hers.

"We need to go." She gestured for Avery to follow her out the door. "I'll explain later," she added when Avery didn't move.

Avery frowned but did as Jane asked.

They'd come in from the far side of the estate, hiking through the woods that bordered it, so they could approach from the least-guarded side. But it would take too long to return that way on foot, with too great a risk of being overtaken by pursuers, so Jane turned the opposite way she'd come, toward the garage where Clem would be procuring a vehicle as soon as he was done taking out the guards.

On cue, the comm in her ear crackled to life. "Your chariot awaits," drawled Clem.

"On our way," said Jane.

"I cut all their communications, and all frequencies but this one are jammed, so they can't call for backup," said Kurt.

Jane guided Avery through the unnaturally quiet hallways. Avery was silent as she stuck close to Jane, but Jane could almost hear the questions in her head. She'd have a lot to explain once they were safely out of here.

They turned a last corner and found Kurt waiting for them.

His eyes lit up when he saw Avery, and Jane didn't miss the way his shoulders sagged slightly in relief.

Avery seemed just as happy to see him. "So you found both of us then."

He nodded, the light in his eyes dimming slightly as he glanced over at Jane. "We need to move."

Jane took point and Kurt brought up the rear, Avery between them, as they made their way through the house to the garage.

They were rounding the last corner when there was a sudden burst of gunfire behind them. Jane grabbed Avery's arm and yanked her around the corner. She could see the door to the garage up ahead.

"Go!" yelled Kurt. But there was something off with the tone of his voice, and Jane jerked her chin back to look at him.

He was leaning against the wall, checking the clip of his gun. And there was a dark, wet patch spreading across his shirt, just beneath the edge of his vest.

"You've been hit!" Her voice didn't sound like hers.

Avery's eyes widened as her gaze followed Jane's. More gunfire sounded in the hallway they'd just left, and a burst of bullets struck the wall in front of them, spraying plaster. Avery jerked back, flattening herself against the wall, looking from Jane to Kurt and back again.

"Go." Kurt reached over and pushed Avery toward Jane. "I'll hold them off. Get to the car. I'll catch up."

But he didn't straighten or move away from the wall, and Jane was sure that he probably couldn't.

"No." She stepped forward. "Lean on me."

But he held up his hand to fend her off. "Get her out of here, Jane." When she moved to knock his hand out of the way, he added, "This time, I'm staying."

And what he was saying hit her with the force of a bullet in the plates. _If I had stayed any longer, I would have died, too_ , he'd said to her. The horrible words she'd said in reply reverberated in her head: _Then you should have stayed._

"No. You're not. We're all going."

The gunshots had slowed, but she could hear footsteps. They had seconds—if that—before their adversaries rounded the corner.

She grabbed his right arm, and pulled it over her shoulders, so she could keep her right hand and the gun it held free.

Avery didn't hesitate, slipping under his other arm.

"Can you keep pressure on the wound?" Jane asked her as they set off awkwardly and far too slowly down the hallway.

Avery reached her free hand out to press on Kurt's side, and Jane heard the pained grunt he couldn't quite stifle. His weight settled more heavily over her shoulder, and she knew he was losing too much blood.

She turned, walking sideways so she could fire behind them, keeping their assailants from following them around the corner.

And then Clem was there. He pulled Avery away, taking her place at Kurt's side. "Through that door," he told her. "GO!"

She hesitated, looking to Jane for confirmation.

"Get your daughter out," Clem said to Jane impatiently. "I've got him."

Avery darted through the door, and Clem hauled Kurt up off Jane's shoulder. His eyes had drifted shut, and Jane shut down the panic that was welling up inside.

Ten steps to the doorway, then nine, eight… She counted down in her head, as she turned to walk backwards, taking careful aim at anything that poked around the corner behind her. She hit one of them, heard his scream as he fell, and felt nothing except cold determination as she guarded her family. Three steps… two… And then they were through. Avery scrambled into the backseat of the SUV that sat waiting, engine running. Clem shoved Kurt in after her, then vaulted into the driver's seat. Jane sent a last barrage of bullets through the doorway then jumped into the backseat beside Kurt.

Clem threw the vehicle in gear and they shot out of the garage, hurtling down the driveway, away from the house to the open iron gates below.

A few stray bullets struck the bullet-proof glass behind them, but it lived up to its billing and held. And then all she could hear was the sound of the engine. What she wasn't hearing was any noise from her husband.

She leaned over him in the cramped quarters of the backseat.

Avery's eyes were wide and scared, but she was still pressing her hand over the hole in Kurt's shirt, her fingers stained red with his blood.

"Good job," Jane told her, trying to make her voice as steady as possible, and knowing that she'd failed by the grim look her daughter shot her.

"Is he gonna be okay?" she asked.

"Yes," said Jane with a confidence she didn't feel as she gently pushed Avery's hands aside and replaced them with her own. "Hang on, Kurt," she said and tried to quell her fear when there was no reply.

###

Hospital waiting rooms looked pretty much the same no matter what country you were in.

Jane listened to the low murmur of German conversation around her and shifted on the hard plastic seat.

Beside her, Avery tried to get comfortable with an apparently similar lack of success.

Clem had dropped them off and then left to ditch the stolen SUV on the other side of the city. Jane didn't expect anyone to follow them, but it couldn't hurt to be safe. She was sure Roman knew that Avery had escaped by now, but what he would do about it was anyone's guess. He had to know there was no way that Jane would ever let him get his hands on her daughter again.

"Kurt's going to be all right, isn't he?" Avery's voice wavered a bit, and for the first time Jane remembered just how young her daughter really was.

"He's strong," Jane assured her. "He's a fighter." He would be okay. He _had_ to be okay. They couldn't leave things like this between them. It couldn't end this way. Jane forced herself to steer away from that line of thinking. "Are you sure there isn't someone you want to call?" she asked Avery instead.

Clem had offered to take Avery wherever she wanted to. Jane hadn't wanted to force her to stay, as much as she didn't want to give up contact with her daughter. But Avery had insisted on remaining at the hospital with Jane, saying there was no one looking for her.

"No. I don't really have any other family. My father has some cousins, but we're not close. It was just my parents and me."

Jane nodded. "Growing up," she said, "it was just my brother and me." And then she stopped, at a loss to know how to explain Roman and his role in Avery's abduction.

Avery nodded and then shifted in her seat, turning to face Jane. "Thank you for coming for me." Before Jane could reply, she continued, "Honestly... I thought you were dead."

Jane blinked in surprise. "You thought I was dead?"

Avery nodded. "Kurt said that he'd heard you had been rescuing people. Kidnap victims. At first I thought that whoever kidnapped me did it to set a trap for you, so they could collect the bounty on you. But then when you didn't come..." Her voice trailed away and she gave a small, sad shrug.

"What do you remember about how you were abducted?" Jane asked carefully.

Avery paused, looking down at her hands as she gathered her thoughts. "We saw Max arrive," she said slowly, "and Kurt went down to talk to him about you. I wanted to go with him, but he made me promise to stay where I was. So I was watching out the window, and someone came into the room behind me. I didn't really get a good look at him. I tried to fight him, but then I must have blacked out, because when I woke up, I was somewhere else, and Kurt wasn't there. I figured… they'd killed him," she said in a small voice. "I mean, as hard as he'd looked for you, I didn't think he'd let them just take me without putting up a fight. So," she swallowed, "I thought maybe you were both dead. I couldn't figure out why they were still holding me though. I mean, if they wanted a ransom paid, how long would they wait for it? Either they'd get their money or they'd just kill me and move on."

Jane couldn't hold back a shudder at the idea, but the matter-of-fact way Avery said it made her pause. "Is kidnapping something you've had to worry about before?"

Avery shrugged. "My dad was rich. My mom and I had bodyguards sometimes, when we traveled or if someone was threatening Dad."

Jane nodded as she took that in. Somehow, she'd thought of Avery as being more sheltered. She'd worried how much to tell her about her abduction, about Roman. And so much of the tattoo cases were classified anyway. But she was sick and tired of secrets, and whether Jane liked it or not, Avery was part of this mess now. She drew a deep breath. "I mentioned that I had a brother," she said slowly. "We believe he's the one who had you kidnapped."

Avery's eyes widened, but she didn't interrupt, and eventually the whole story spilled out. Roman, the new tattoos, the bounty on her head, Avery's adoption paperwork… and how Kurt was certain that he'd killed Avery.

"But nobody shot me," Avery argued. "They just knocked me out with some kind of drug, and when I woke up, there was something on my clothes that looked like blood, but it wasn't really." She shook her head. "You think this Roman—your brother—faked my death? Just to make Kurt think he was responsible?"

Jane nodded.

"That's horrible," Avery breathed. She looked stricken. "How did he—He must have felt terrible."

"He did," Jane assured her. For the first time, she allowed herself to think about the full breadth of Kurt's devastation. How would she have felt if she'd thought she'd _killed_ Bethany? She swallowed, unable to deal with the magnitude of grief that thought caused. "But that's why he didn't look for you right away," she told Avery. "He believed you were dead."

"So how did you find me? Or even know to look for me?"

"When I found out that I'd had a daughter," Jane told her, "I asked Clem to look for you. Just—just to know that you were okay. I didn't know if you'd want to know about me, if you even knew that you were adopted. Anyway, he found out where you'd been taken."

"I knew," said Avery quietly. "I always knew I was adopted. But I wondered sometimes… why my mom gave me away."

"I didn't." Jane put her hand on Avery's arm, willing her to believe her. "I _never_ wanted to give you away. I loved you, but Shepherd..."

"Shepherd?"

Jane closed her eyes. How to explain about Shepherd without making Avery run away from her crazy family tree? "My parents died when I was very young. Roman and I were adopted by a woman who called herself Shepherd." She decided to omit the orphanage for now. There was no reason for Avery to know just how damaged her mother was. "Shepherd wasn't a very good person. I was only sixteen when I got pregnant. I wanted to keep you, but Shepherd took you from me and arranged for you to be adopted. I never knew what happened to you."

Avery sank back in her seat and digested that. "I thought you had your memory wiped," she said eventually. "Do you remember me at all?"

Jane nodded, blinking against the sudden rush of tears. "I remember holding you and singing to you. I remember that I loved you very much. And I remember waking up and realizing that you were gone."

Avery exhaled, looking sad. She reached for Jane's hand. "I know it's not much, but… I'm here now."

Jane squeezed her daughter's fingers. "It's more than I thought I'd get," she admitted.

"Mrs. Weller?" A kindly-looking nurse stopped in front of them.

Fear leapt in Jane's throat. "Is Kurt okay?"

The nurse held out a bag. "I have your husband's personal effects," she said slightly-accented English.

"How is he? Can I see him?"

The nurse gently pushed the bag into Jane's hands. "He is still in surgery. I'll send someone to you as soon as he's out."

Jane stared helplessly at her retreating back.

"Kurt's gonna be okay," Avery reassured her.

She nodded, drawing a deep breath. She opened the bag and peered inside, finding Kurt's wallet and cell phone. Something shiny glinted up at her from the bottom of the bag and she reached inside to pull it out.

It was her wedding band.

She looked at it for a long moment and then shut her eyes. She'd told him it was over and walked out. He had no reason to expect her back this time. But he'd still picked up her ring and carried it with him, as he had done for eighteen months before.

Maybe he hadn't given up on her yet, even though she'd certainly given him plenty of reason to.

"Is that your ring?" asked Avery, startling Jane out of her thoughts.

She nodded.

"So he never gave it back to you? After all of that?" The dismay on Avery's face was palpable.

"He gave it back. I… took it off."

Avery frowned. "Why?"

Jane sighed. "He lied to me. He didn't tell me about meeting you or that he thought you were dead."

"So how did you find out?"

Jane shook her head. "He told me eventually. But not until much later."

"Oh." Avery shifted in her seat. "I can't imagine trying to tell your wife that you killed her kid. That must have been awful for him."

Jane nodded. "It was," she whispered. And she'd been too grief-stricken to think about how he'd felt or what he'd gone through. Or the awful things she'd said to him.

 _This time, I'm staying_ , he'd said.

She was less successful stifling this round of tears.

"Hey!" Avery regarded her with alarm. "He's gonna be okay." She wrapped her arm around Jane's shoulders.

Jane looked down at the ring in her hand. Part of her wanted to wait until Kurt could put it back on her hand. But another, stronger, part of her just wanted it back on her finger where it belonged. Just like she wanted her husband back in her arms where _he_ belonged.

She pushed the ring over her knuckles and into place. And then she turned her face into her daughter's shoulder, hugging her tightly and accepting the comfort she offered.

###

His stomach hurt.

Kurt came awake slowly. Something was wrong, he knew that, but he couldn't seem to remember what. He could feel the familiar comforting warmth of Jane's hand in his, though, so he let himself drift.

Why did his stomach hurt?

It wasn't so much his stomach, he realized, but his whole side. He'd been… shot? And then the whole thing came rushing back to him, and his eyes flew open.

He was in the hospital, a conclusion reinforced by the steady beeping of medical equipment beside him. He turned his head slightly and then blinked at the sight beside him.

In the pale, early-morning light, he could see Jane, asleep in the chair beside his bed. One slender forearm was resting on the bed beside his hip, her cheek pillowed atop it, her face turned toward him. And her other hand was clasped in his, where it rested beside him on the bed. And just beyond Jane, he could see Avery, healthy and whole and _alive_ , asleep in the chair beside Jane's.

They were both okay. They'd found Avery, alive and unharmed. He'd returned Jane's daughter to her.

And in that moment, all he could feel was relief. It didn't make up for what he'd done, and he knew it wouldn't change anything between him and Jane, but it plugged a hole in his heart that had torn open when he'd ripped back the curtain to find her body there on the ground.

Jane murmured something in her sleep but didn't wake up.

He'd always loved to watch her sleep. She was someone who didn't let her guard down easily, and it had always filled him with a sort of affectionate pride that she could relax so fully with him. He loved the way she'd curl beside him as she drifted off, her muscles slackening as she sank almost bonelessly into him, the way her features softened as she let go of all the tensions of the day.

That she was sleeping so soundly now, when he knew she wouldn't choose to be so close to him, was testimony to what she'd been through in the past few days, he supposed.

He couldn't imagine that she'd intentionally taken his hand. Muscle memory, perhaps, left over from the days when they reached out for each other in their sleep. God knows, he still reached for her, but his hands came away empty now.

He released her fingers and pulled his hand away from hers. He couldn't bear to see her snatch her hand back if she awoke to find it curled in his.

The small motion was enough to rouse her. Her eyes opened and she blinked into sudden wakefulness, her gaze immediately finding his. "How are you?" she asked, in a voice hoarse and husky with sleep, as she sat up, pulling away from him.

"Fine," he lied. "How is she?" He nodded at the still-sleeping Avery.

Jane turned to look at her daughter, her features softening. "She's fine. Completely fine."

"They didn't… hurt her?" Thinking about what might have happened to Avery had been one of the nightmares that had kept him awake in the days before they rescued her.

"No." Jane gave a swift shake of her head. "She said they fed her decently and let her watch Netflix." Her lips curved up at the resilience of youth. "She tried to escape twice. The second time she made it over the fence, but she didn't get very far before they caught her and brought her back. She's pretty tough."

"Like her mom."

Jane gave a small shrug, rejecting his words.

As though sensing that she was the subject of conversation, Avery shifted in her seat and awoke, sitting upright with a jerk. She blinked, obviously disoriented, before her dark eyes focused on Kurt. "You're awake!" She grinned and leaned forward, placing her hand on the blanket over his ankle.

"How are you?" he asked her.

She frowned and quirked an eyebrow at him. "That's my line. You're the one who got shot."

"I'm fine," he assured her.

She exhaled, obviously relieved. "You really scared us."

He carefully didn't look at Jane. "I'm sorry. Wasn't my plan to."

Avery rolled her eyes. "Don't do it again," she ordered him.

She sounded so much like her mother that he couldn't suppress a small smile. "Yes, ma'am."

She flopped back in her seat and crossed her arms, but she was smiling.

And the fact that she could smile and joke reassured him that she hadn't suffered any permanent damage during her imprisonment.

The door to the room opened, and a nurse bustled in. "Welcome back, Mr. Weller." She moved around the side of his bed, checking his pulse and other vital signs. "The doctor will be in shortly," she said. "Your wife and daughter can wait outside until he is done."

Jane and Avery climbed to their feet. "Actually," said Jane, looking at Avery, "I think we'll go down to the cafeteria and get something to eat. We'll be back in a little bit."

"You don't have to come back," he said quietly, offering her an out. "The pilot is waiting for us at the airport. You guys go ahead, I'll catch a commercial flight when they release me."

Avery's eyes widened as she looked from him to Jane and back again.

Jane pursed her lips and shot him a quelling look, but said only, "We'll be back after we eat."

He looked around the room, seeing no sign of the clothes he'd been wearing. "Did my phone make it? I should check in with Reade."

Jane pointed to a bag sitting on the table beside his bed. "Your things are in there."

He nodded. "Thanks."

"We'll be back," Jane said again, before heading out the door.

Avery shot him a reassuring smile over her shoulder as she followed.

The nurse left, and he reached for the bag. He dumped it out in his lap, glad to see that his phone didn't appear damaged and still had enough charge left to make a call.

And then he realized what was missing from the pile. He looked again in the bag and flipped through the bills in his wallet, but it was no use.

Jane's ring was gone.

He swallowed and closed his eyes. He'd carried the damn thing halfway around the world, for months on end, and never once misplaced it. This time, he'd only had it for a few weeks, and he'd lost it.

It was a sign, he concluded grimly. Jane's ring was gone, just like his marriage, and probably soon just like Jane herself. Things were too tense, too strained between them for them to stay together at the FBI. Technically, she wasn't an FBI employee, and she wasn't required to help with the cases. She could leave if she really wanted to. Roman wouldn't like it, but knowing what he'd been willing to do to Avery in order to get to Jane, Kurt felt a vested interest in making sure nothing ever went the way Roman wanted to again.

He lifted his hand and looked at his own ring. For a brief moment, he considered taking it off. But that thought hurt worse than the pain in his side, so he left it on his finger and picked up his phone to call Reade instead.

###

"I'm not gonna be able to convince you to come back to work with me, am I?" asked Clem with a sigh.

He'd caught Jane and Avery as they were coming out of the cafeteria. Avery had excused herself to find the ladies' room, leaving Jane alone with Clem in the lobby.

Jane smiled and shook her head. "I belong in New York."

He tilted his head. "With the FBI? Or with Weller?"

"Both," she admitted. Working at the FBI gave her purpose. She'd found purpose working K&R with Clem, but she'd never been able to fill the hole in her heart without Kurt.

Clem shook his head. "Jane Doe with a husband and a kid. Gotta be honest, never saw that coming."

"Two kids, actually," she replied, thinking about Bethany.

"Is that what you want? A life of boring domesticity?"

Jane stifled a grin. Nothing about the tattoo cases was either boring or particularly "domestic," but she wasn't about to try to explain that to Clem. "It's what I want," she said firmly.

He shrugged. "Well, you know where to find me if you change your mind."

"I won't," she assured him, but she leaned over to give him a hug. "Thanks for helping me get Avery back," she whispered.

His arms tightened for a minute, and she knew he'd been hoping for more from her. "Keep better track of your kid," he muttered, pushing her away.

"I will." Over his shoulder, she caught sight of said kid, watching them with a funny look on her face.

Avery moved over to stand beside Jane as Clem turned away and headed out of the hospital. "Did you guys have a thing?" she asked with the bluntness Jane had quickly grown to expect from her.

"We did _not_ ," she said firmly, "have a _thing_."

Avery nodded. "That's good. Kurt's a good guy. He doesn't deserve that."

Jane turned to regard her daughter steadily. "Kurt's the best man I've ever known."

"So you're not going to walk out on him again?"

"No, I am not." This time she was staying. For good.

Avery's lips curled up in a relieved smile. "I like him," she admitted.

And maybe it wasn't an odd thing, hearing her daughter say that she liked the man Jane had chosen, but it still made something warm bloom inside her chest. "Me too. But he hates hospitals. Let's go get him before he fights off the nurse and checks himself out."

###

Kurt tucked his phone and wallet into the pockets of the pants the nurse had found for him to wear, trying not to think about Jane's missing ring and the burning hole he could feel in his pocket.

He knew there was a pretty good chance she was going to tell him that she'd decided to go back to working K&R jobs with Clem. Maybe not right away—he knew she would want to spend more time with Avery, and Jane wouldn't leave her daughter unless she was sure she'd be safe. And Roman was still out there and they'd only scratched the surface of the new tattoos. But eventually…. Eventually they'd stop Roman and wrap up the tattoos. And then what?

 _I didn't have a purpose, some way of defining myself outside of you. Outside of us._

She'd found her purpose, and she'd chosen a life that didn't include him. The sooner he accepted that, the easier it would be for all of them.

"I told the nurse there was no way you'd sit in a wheelchair," Jane said from the doorway.

He forced a smile. "You're right. Are you ready to go? I called the pilot. The plane is ready to go when we are."

"We're ready."

In the hallway behind her, he could see Avery waiting alone.

"Is Clem back yet?"

Jane shook her head. "He's off to the next job." She didn't look particularly upset to miss out, but he couldn't read her anymore.

"When you talk to him," he said instead, "tell him I said thanks. For everything."

She nodded. "Come on, it's time to go."

She turned to go, and as she did, a flash of something caught his eye. He reached for her hand without thinking, but then realized what he'd done and let her fingers slip from his grasp.

"I—ah. You found your ring. I thought I lost it," he admitted.

She turned to face him. "No, you kept it safe. It was in the bag with your things."

"Oh." But why had she put it back on her finger?

She looked down at it, twisting it around with her opposite hand. "I was… kind of hoping you might be willing to give me another chance."

He looked at her blankly. "Give _you_ another chance? I'm the one who screwed up."

Her lips pursed and then formed a rueful smile. "I think we both did. We did exactly what Roman wanted us to do." She took a step closer. "I mean… we can't keep secrets like that from each other." Her voice was stern and determined. "But I should have stayed and figured out how to work things out, instead of walking out on you." She paused and added with a sigh, _"Again."_

"So you want me to give you another chance to give me another chance?" He risked a look at her face then.

There was a soft, familiar light in her green eyes as she smiled at him. "Something like that. If I haven't used up all my chances yet."

His arms opened to her without conscious decision on his part. "You get as many chances as you want," he admitted.

And then she was in his arms, her arms wrapping around his waist, careful not to put pressure over his wound, but hugging him as tightly as she could. His arms closed around her, and he buried his face in her hair, inhaling her, as he smoothed his hands up the familiar curves of her back.

"I love you," she whispered into his shoulder.

He hugged her tighter. "I love you, too."

In the open doorway, he caught a glimpse of Avery, looking intently down the hallway and studiously ignoring her mother and stepfather's embrace.

"I'm so glad she's all right," he murmured.

Jane pulled away slightly to look up at him. "Me too, but—" She stopped, frowning. "That's not why."

"Not why what?" he asked, not following.

"Not why I want us to try to fix this."

"It doesn't matter." And really, it didn't. He'd been given another chance, and he wasn't too proud to take it. He'd screwed up, more than once, but by some miracle, Avery was alive, and Jane still wanted to be married to him.

"It _does_ matter," Jane insisted, a stubborn look in her eye that he'd learned to ignore at his peril, so he shut his mouth and listened. "I blamed you because it was easier. And I pushed you away because—" Her voice faltered a moment. "Because it was easier to pretend I didn't need anyone than it was to admit that I put you and Avery and Bethany in danger."

"You didn't—"

"I did and I do." She regarded him unflinchingly. "And I had to decide whether that meant I should run away again, or if I can trust myself and you to keep our family safe. And I do. Trust you. Not because Avery is alive, but because _I know you_. If there had been _any_ way to get her out of that situation, you would have done it. I shouldn't have blamed you, and I'm sorry."

"I blame me." His voice was hoarse, and he cleared his throat. "I shouldn't have left her there."

"If you hadn't, she'd be dead." Green eyes met his without flinching. "She wouldn't have gotten the antidote in time, and she would have died."

Even if that were true… "I can't forgive myself," he admitted.

Jane raised up on her toes to rest her forehead against his. "I know you can't. I can't forgive myself either. I've hurt you so many times…" Her voice cracked, and she continued, "Maybe we can help each other find a way to forgive ourselves."

"You're a pretty smart lady," he whispered. He reached up to touch her cheek, reveling in the simple knowledge that he could.

"I married a pretty smart man. And a _good_ man. And I'm going to keep him," she declared, nuzzling her cheek against his palm.

"He'd like that." And then he leaned forward, to press his lips softly against hers.

She made a tiny noise in the back of her throat, and her arms came up to wrap around his neck.

The kiss was long and slow, learning each other anew, full of regret and forgiveness and love. And when they finally drew back slightly, it was just so he could press his lips to her forehead and fold her in, close to his heart.

Jane turned her head slightly, and he felt rather than heard her small, throaty chuckle.

His gaze followed hers to the hallway, where Avery had given up trying to pretend she wasn't looking at them and was now leaning back against the wall, arms folded across her chest, as she regarded them with a full-on teenage smirk.

"It's not fair," muttered Jane. "This one likes you better too."

"No, she doesn't," he argued automatically, although he couldn't deny that Avery looked pretty pleased about their obvious reconciliation.

"The next one better be a boy who loves _me_ best."

"I'm a boy who loves you best," he argued and then stopped, leaning back to look down at her. "Do you mean that?"

"Well, maybe not right now." She lifted her hand to make an all-encompassing gesture. "We've still got to deal with Roman and Crawford and God knows how many tattoos. But… eventually. If you want," she added, more hesitantly.

"I want," he said, very definitely, and kissed her hard and quick on the lips.

"Good." Her lips curved up in a grin as he pulled away. "Let's get our kid and go home. I got your pain pills from the nurse," she added, as she wrapped her arm around him, molding herself to his good side, and steered him out the door. "You _are_ taking them on the flight home."

 _Our kid_. "Let's go home," he echoed. He would gladly accept any amount of fussing over him that she wanted to do if it meant they would go home together.

"And this time," she warned him sternly, "we're _both_ staying."


End file.
